In the beginning...

Few things in this life are constant. It's not unusual to experience all four seasons in 36 hours, or for the stock market to resemble the heart-rate readout of an Illinois politician during a lie-detector test.

But, we hold these truths constant and dear:
* The sun will always rise in the East.
* Notre Dame will always be overrated.
* And Crash will always be Crash.

When Crash entered this world during the summer of 1990, his arrival caused a massive power outage. When Crash started to crawl, the Earth quaked with fear. Crash never learned to walk - he skipped straight to running. In elementary school, a girl broke Crash's nose for no good reason. Around that same time, a window attacked Crash's arm in self-defense.

He's achieved notoriety for being a basketball star, a soccer star, a rowing star, and an excellent speller (though his penmanship could use some work). He's explored the wilderness of Canada, and he's been chased by bears in Tennessee. He once traveled to Denver by train because his parents made him. He's also seen three of the four Twilight movies, in case you wanted to know.

There is no adventure too big or too small, and now we can all go along for the ride. Bring plenty of Band-Aids.